Life isn’t Meaningless

Life isn’t Meaningless

I felt like my life was meaningless. I wanted to end it. I had all the comforts of life,  but still didn’t want to live it.

At the end of darkness when I had given up I suddenly stopped. I asked myself to give one more try and give myself a chance.
It’s hard to believe that my biggest challenge was waking up in the morning so I decided to beat it like I used to beat all my fears as a child. I would tell myself that I am bigger than my fears. I started doing it again. I brought discipline in myself. It was really hard to handle so I started opening up about it with my friends.
My family’s love and friends’ support helped me to go through the struggle I had to go through everyday.
I started having small walks in the morning and planning my day. For the first time I stopped skipping meals, especially breakfast.

I cannot say I am an accomplished person. The difference now is that I want to fight and not escape into another world.
I still have to deal with it everyday but the change in my routine and being able to talk about it has made me stronger.
I don’t hate myself anymore. I am 27 years old and for me this is a beginning.
It is really never too late to change. It is really never too late to chase your dreams. To feel happy again. At least it is never really late to try. 

Now I know who I am and what my challenges are. I don’t win everyday but I have finally started feeling alive.

Story written by Farzeen Amin from Pakistan